What We Are Reading: The Help

Like most moms, I spend a fair amount of time worrying about lots of things. Some important, but mostly, like most of moms, about the little things. 

I started this section on my blog because I feel I have some insights in this area, that can help other moms. Just as importantly however because I have questions of my own.

Books have always been some of my best friends. Sadly, since becoming a mommy I find that they are  some of my most neglected friends. 

Sure I read, a chapter hear, a book cover there. Blogs galore, articles on various topics of interest; What to feed my toddler. How to know if your child loves you. How to stop aggressive behavior. How to stay connected as a couple. Things that could be secretly ruining my relationship. You get the picture.

I also take a lot of quizzes. Mostly from Buzzfeed and BabyCenter. A few weeks ago, I took one: Are you doing everything you can to build a love of reading in your child. I took it, because even though I'm pretty sure I'm nailing it, I'm a sucker for anything that can cause self doubt. 

I did pretty well. Except on one question. Does your child see you reading. I read daily. (See above) The thing is, the articles, blogs, quizzes, they are ALL on my phone. So for all Animal knows I'm just playing with my phone. I have picked up all of three books since my sons birth. Three books in three years and I've read zero. 

That's right, I said Zero.

What a pitiful example I make. Sure I read to Animal, books by the dozen. But how often can he say mommy reads a story to herself, because she loves to read too? None.

I had to change that immediately. 

I started with (drumroll please). The Help by Kathryn Stockett. I wanted to read it after reading an interview with the author just before the movie came out. I watched it with a friend and really enjoyed it. She happened to mention that she had been waiting for some story lines she thought important,  but overall she still enjoyed. I was still pregnant when I watched, but at the time I was busy reading books about pregnancy and labor & delivery. No just because books, I was a busy girl then, with a strong agenda.

Well three and a half years later. I finally read it. Verdict? As usual the book was better than the movie.  All the same, the best part was curling up on the couch.  On Animals bedroom floor while he played. On the picnic table while he looked for bugs in the yard. Maybe especially nostalgic,  in bed way past my bedtime with my lamp on. I finished over a weekend, and Animal got to see mommy read for fun. 

What We Are Reading: BATMAN Who is Clayface?

The hubby has a new job and is working near a comic book store. 

When he came home with, BATMAN Who Is Clayface by Donald Lemke, pictures by Steven E. Gordon Colors by Eric A. Gordon.  I have to say I was a little disappointed. Not because I'm not a fan, but because Animal is a little much sometimes and super hero/bad guy play,  is not something he needs any extra encouraging with. 

All doubts however were wiped away when I saw the excitement in his face! One important thing when hoping to instill a love of books in a child (or any person for that matter) is to remember, interest in subject matter is of utmost importance. So if like me you're not a fan of sci-fi, don't frown when your child comes home with Dune.  Instead look on the bright side. If your child brought home a book it's probably going to get read. There in lies the trick.

What's the silver lining in our new favorite bedtime story?

1. VOCABULARY! 

What's a detective mama? A person who solves mysteries by paying attention to clues and asking questions.  What's a batarang? It's a special boomerang that looks like a bat. What's a viking? A Scandinavian pirate. What's a utility belt? It's like grandpas tool belt only filled with the things Batman needs to fight crime. 

We have learned a lot of new words.  They are seeping into his free play time and therefore creating new synapses in his little brain. Important new information onto which he can connect other new facts. This is important because it's hard to grasp new information unless it can be connected to knowledge already acquired. 

2. ATTENTION SPAN. 

This book is 36 pages long, it takes longer to read, but he is so interested in the content  and pictures that he follows closely. A skill that will translate to other books and activities.

3. EXTENDED LEARNING POSSIBILITIES. 

This story has a lot to work off as far as lesson planning goes.

For instance in the story Clayface robs a bank. What can he learn from this you might wonder? 

We can play bank. We can practice counting skills, sorting, and simple math can be presented. If he were a little older we might draw up our own money and talk about where money comes from. We might visit a bank, talk through the process of depositing and withdrawing money. What other things can you do at a bank? Maybe take a deposit and withdrawal slips to copy and have some writing and math practice. 

There are also science opportunities. Matt Hagen becomes Clayface when he falls into toxic goo. You could play mad scientist. Look up the recipe for silly putty, play dough, gak, or clay. You could fill glasses with a few drops of yellow, red and blue food coloring. Then mix them with your child to see what new colors they get.

How about art or PE? Trace your child on butcher paper of let them trace you. Then color or paint a few "wax" figures. Put them up around your backyard and let your kid go wild with a boomerang. 

If my son was older and had some writing skills I might ask him to imagine he was Mat Hagen and tell me how he might use is new shape shifting skills in a short story. If he got really creative, I could help him transform his story into a short play. We could build a set and make a short video. 

The possibilities to get creative and teach your child in a meaningful way through his own interest  are really only as limited as your imagination.

Now get out there and have fun!

What We Are Reading: Building Empathy

Empathetic children. It's a characteristic most of us can agree we want our children to have. We're not the only ones. Experts have been talking a lot about it. I was reminded of this when I read this great article .

It was about why it's so important for boys and how to foster it. I giggled a little, not because I thought it was silly, but because one of the first tips was about giving little boys baby dolls. It reminded me of a certain story I shared with you. 

The other tips where great too. One was about reading with our children. It talks about a gap in reading to girls vs. boys by parents. The gap starts even before a first birthday. This makes me so sad, but I can totally relate. 

Reading is one of my greatest loves and I have been waiting so long to share that love with my child(ren). When Animal wanted nothing to do with books I could have literally cried. I refused to give up, reading daily to him. Eventually the day came when he picked his own story. It just got better from there. I could have given up, would have given up, if reading didn't mean so much to me. 

Empathy is an important skill for both sexes, it fosters courage, happiness and even success in the work place. 

Children's books are a great place to begin to build this essential skill. Books allow children to experience different points of view. To understand why others feel sad, happy, excited, scared, or lonely. To name their feelings. When you read to your child you can facilitate this process. You can ask leading questions like," What do you think the boy is feeling?" , "Why do you think he's scared?", or  "What would you do if this was happening to you?"

I have noticed my son has a hard time understanding when I'm upset. If I scowl and ask, "Am I happy or grumpy?" he can easily identify how I feel. I reward him with happy faces as well. He has really responded to this and I find he is more easily redirected this way. We can hone this skill at story time. When we read I like to ask, "Does he have a happy face or a grumpy face?" 

At work I use this technique as well. If someone is unkind or aggressive in my class room I ask them to look at their friend, how do they look? How do they think their friend is feeling right now? And finally, What can you do to make your friend feel better? Even two year old can start to understand and contemplate these things. By the end of the year I don't have to prompt them very often, they learn what to look for and how to make a situation right. Don't get me wrong, they are children and don't always care to make things right, but it's not about creating submissive robots, it's about giving them the tools to function socially.

There are many children's books specifically about feelings, and how to deal with them. There are also books like, HEY, LITTLE ANT By Phillip and Hannah Hoose.  That directly ask children to think about how they or others may feel. They are great. But don't think you have to limit yourself to books like this. Fiction titles are especially good at doing the same thing in a profound and meaningful way. 

I can still remember sobbing when I read Where The Red Fern Grows. Or how concerned I was for Ponyboy and Johnny. These characters along with hundreds of others taught me about being someone outside of myself. Outside of my comfort and even made me care for or understand someone I may have otherwise written off or disliked. The empathy that can be built when you step outside of yourself and into someone elses' shoes it's unparalleled,  because there just no other way to feel what someone else feels and think their thoughts and live their outside influences as well.

Empathetic children, another reason to read to your child.

What We Are Reading: The Block Mess Monster

Have I got a book for you!

I bought this book a few years back, I skimmed through it decided it was not lesson plan material, and threw it in my late spring/early summer bin for our class bookshelf. I picked that time of the year because most of my class has turned 3 by then and I thought the concepts in the story and language were better suited for 3 year olds.

What book am I talking about?

A New Favorite!

The Block Mess Monster by Betsie Howie, illustrated by C. B. Decker, has become a class favorite! Not just my class of toddlers, but from my 2.5-5 years old. The kids LOVE this book. The younger ones love the pictures (as do I) and the older ones really seem to feel for the main characters plight. I have been reading this book multiple times a day to a fascinated and giggling crowd for two weeks. It is not getting old. I love to read it, and they love to listen. Animal even tells me at home he is Calpurnia. 

This story is about Calpurnia, her mother, and the block mess monster. A monster made of blocks that is keeping our protagonist from cleaning her room and her mother who cannot see this creature (only the giant mess) and who is loosing patience, fast.

I really enjoy the back and forth the mother and daughter have. It's really all of us parents, loosing our cool at some point after having nagged, all day? all morning? for our children to do just one simple thing. To clean up their toys. Only told from the perspective of the frustrated child, because let's fast it, it's hard not to be understood by the adults (well meaning as we might be). 

What parent hasn't been here?

The kids just crack up at the this marvelous (dare I say accurate) portrayal of the mother at her wits end. The best part of the story, is that in the end the mother figures out how to help her daughter and Calpurnia feels heard. It's really what we all want. I highly recommend this book and believe me I'll be looking for this book in hardcover come Christmas for my own little one!

Buying Children's Books Cheap

Acquiring an assortment of books for your child(ren) can get very, very expensive quickly. In order to do so on a budget will require some thought and planning on your part, but can certainly be done. Here are a few helpful tips on building a library for your home.

1. Buy (or get) used. Garage sales, flea markets, thrift stores, craigslist, freecycle, friends, family (because fellow book lovers hate to get rid of books, but love to pass them on to a new home) and even your local library. They are all great places to find gently loved books. Kids don't mind a few scribbles or a bent corner. They only care about the chance to read a new story with you.

2. Check out the bargain section at your local big box store. You can often get some great hardcovers for as much as 90% off retail price.

3. Costco has an amazing assortment of books for all ages. Instead of buying those giant delicious (and alarmingly addicting) muffins pick up a new book for the kids. Also why not let them look through while you finish your shopping so you can get through your shopping list little faster (expert tip: if thumbing through the pictures doesn't keep their interest, don't buy it).

4. Add books to wish lists and registries. We added all our favorites (that I hadn't already purchased) to our baby registry. Not everyone can afford the crib bedding or stroller you're dying to get, and those bottles, pacifiers and bibs are snatched up quick, what can a well meaning acquaintance pick up? How about a hardcover of Shel Silverstein's The Giving Tree. I love to gift books to all the children in my life and while I'm fortunate enough to work with young children and know what most preschoolers are into I have a harder time shopping for teeny boppers, so a tip from parents is especially helpful.

5. Lastly my favorite, Scholastic Book Clubs. Remember those awesome flyer's that you used to get sent home monthly when you were a kid, with all your favorite Judy Blume books? Or was I the only dork begging my parents to spend 50 bucks on all the books I couldn't live without! If your child is in school and brings these flyer's home, use them. They have incredible deals. Also they allow your child's teacher to build their class library like no other. Giving your child the most books for your hard earned buck. Every month they have at least 1 book for a dollar each. I snatch up these deals for stocking stuffers, party favors, student gifts and just because gifts. Also the variety of books, hard covers, books on cd, books for your tablet and boxed sets are great. I have several boxed sets waiting for the day when Animal starts reading to himself by lamp curled up under his blankets words blurring into each other, chin falling into his chest as the book drops out of his hand from exhaustion. I digress. Is your child not in school yet? Don't fret, you can get a scholastic parent account. Full disclosure, I don't know the details of buying straight from scholastic from a parent account, but I have been a teacher running a scholastic account for my class for 14 years and they blow me away. Every. Year.

I have been collecting books for my child since I was 18, so it's no wonder he has so many books available to him. I know however that it's never too early or too late to fill your child's life with words, stories, and imagination builders. As an early childhood educator believe me I know how pricey and beyond you it can feel to provide your child an assortment of books. So use these tips. Read with your child. I promise you will see it was money well spent.

What We Are Reading: Little Bea And The Snowy Day

Little Bea And The Snowy Day

Every Christmas I order a holiday book from Scholastic book clubs for each of the students in my class. I choose the holiday book that's on sale, usually a dollar maybe two each (because I'm a preschool teacher not an engineer). I sign the book with a Christmas wish and hope they will enjoy with their family for at least a few months. 

Sometimes (most times) the book is from a known book series, but sometimes it's  new book, as was the case this year. Little Bea And The Snowy Day by Daniel Roode  published 12/27/2011. It's a book about a busy bee, her friends and their fun day in the snow.

We live in sunny California and have not yet taken our first trip to the snow. I do NOT love this book. Honestly I don't even enjoy reading it. Maybe because I didn't grow up playing in snow, and I hate the cold. This year we had a two week dip into 29-33 degree nights and days that barely touched 50 degrees and I swore I would die. So you can see I am very biased. 

Animal on the other hand LOVES this book and weeks after Christmas, this is still requested at least once a week, and I must read a minimum of twice. He loves the pictures and he likes the simple words. That rhyme on some pages and don't on others (something that makes me a little crazy, as I find it harder to find a comfortable rhythm to read aloud with). He doesn't care. I try to focus on how much I enjoy snuggling my little guy.  

So what to do with a book you don't love to read? Try a little lesson planning. Focus on skills you're trying to build on. 

I like to ask Animal questions about what the little forest friends are doing. I ask him to point out colors or help me count. I also ask open ended questions, like what kind of snow friend would you build? Because we're still working on vocabulary and communication.

At some point in the story the furry friends dig in the snow and then show each other what they have found. If you don't want to go outside, or you would like a contained area, you can do the same activity with a bowl, or water table filled with snow, fake snow in my case and small toys. You can roll "snowballs" with mashed potatoes and have a little sensory fun.

Give them measuring cups and cups or bowls of different sizes. Ask them to guess how many scoops it will take to fill each. Which will take more? Yay for math fun. 

Or have a "snowball" fight with crumpled paper if you want P.E. I can think of so many activities to do with this book that I almost love it. If you're looking for ideas or want more in this area just leave in the comments section. 

See you next Thursday, until then I hope you and your little ones can snuggle together for a great story.

What We Are Reading: Spot Goes To School

Two weeks ago we were getting Animal ready for his first day of school. We started with a visit to his classroom, and then we started reading books about starting preschool. We don't always read books that are timely with real life events, but I couldn't think of a good way to introduce the idea of school to a boy with limited life experience.

His favorite by far was: Spot Goes to School by Eric Hill. Spot is a lovable puppy (who you have probably already met if you have a toddler) with simple, fun stories that let children relate and enjoy real life experiences in a whimsical way, he (Spot) fast becomes a toddler favorite.

We have read this story a minimum of three times a day for the last  two weeks. This book is a lift the flaps book, which are very popular for the two and under crowd.

The first few times we read he couldn't help but look under the flaps as soon as I turned the page. Now with thirty plus times having heard the story, he patiently waits, little fingers itching to lift the flap, until I read the page. He's picked up a new word and laughs as he shows me what's under the flap. It's fun for both of us. Some books really benefit from you making silly voices, but the Spot books are very engaging with only a little enthusiasm from you.

There's also a website where you can have FUN WITH SPOT. Check it out, lots of information about the author, other titles, games for fun and learning and of course you can buy Spot books there.